Body Revelation

Friday, January 15, 2016

A couple days ago, while browsing Pinterest I discovered an image that stopped me in my track. I thought "Wow, this is my body!" It's called broad-shouldered pear.

(Illustration by Anna Sudit for Refinery 29)
I kid you not. That is me to a T!

I have given quite some thoughts to my body and the clothes I wear lately (mainly in the form of "wahwah I have no style") and all of a sudden Pinterest opened a door of great ideas for my wardrobe. Also it gives me ideas on how to work out for my body type. I'm motivated! The down side is that this body type is prone to gaining weight quickly and hanging on to fat (um, yeah I noticed!). But wrap dresses and anything that cinches the waist and darkens the bottom part of my body should do the trick.

I know this sounds so superficial, but I'm so relieved to have found ideas for what to wear and how to wear it. I have felt so unmotivated to wear normal clothes (I work from home. Yoga pants and I are tight) and have felt so bad about my body and the way I look. Now I'm thinking I can have self confidence again in this area and that's really something nice.

What a day!

Thursday, January 7, 2016

 2016 has started rather well. Jude has been sleeping through the night, going to bed by 7 and waking up by 630 or so. Leo has also been sleeping through the night –in our bed, because he doesn’t want to share a room with his brother. We’ve been watching good shows on TV (see how I put that right after sleep? Priorities!): Making a Murderer, Broadchurch. I’ve read good books (Boys in the Boat, Between the World and Me) and listening to great podcasts (Serial, Undisclosed. Yes, there is a bit of a murder theme in what I watch and listen to it appears). Good, good.

But today was a mess of a day! Joe has been gone on a business trip to Costa Rica. And by business trip I mean all inclusive resort because his travel agency always gets massive deals on great places. He's golfing and spending along time in a beach resort. I'm so not jealous. Not at all. So yeah, I’m alone with the boys. No problem. I’ve done that a few times. I know the routine. But this morning, right after coming home from dropping off the boys to their respective schools (it takes me about 1h15 in the morning) and arriving late to my desk, I realized that I purchased a gift for my (quasi) sister-in-law from a scam site. Off I called my bank and file a claim. Not even an hour later, I had to leave for an appointment to the travel clinic to get shots for my upcoming trip to Uganda. Then back to work for a few hours (thankfully busy and quite productive time, yay) and off again to pick up the boys (which takes me a good 1h30 in the evening). I tried to sign up Leo for a cooking class at school but was too late and was told the class was full. Fortunately Leo didn’t care much (“I can go when I’m more growned up.”) When I arrived at daycare, Jude immediately started crying for his pacifier, which they try not to give at daycare. Big hot tears. The teachers are lovely but I often look like a deer about to get hit by a car in the night when I pick up Jude. I don’t know how the other moms do it. They’re all super happy, energetic, and well put together. I’m lucky if my sweat pants don’t have Jude’s breakfast all over and if my socks match. Then I got home and it was go-go-prevent baby from falling from table on which he's climbed-prevent baby from coloring his ear or our couch-oh right, make dinner-go until cranky Jude went to bed –thankfully early- and Leo went to, earlier than usual because he has not taken naps at school this week (woot!). 

Now I’m relaxing with a glass of wine and have just realized I have a call with Zambia at 10:40p. Whoops.

I realize that it was not such a bad day. I was just all over the place and felt a bit weary. But I also felt like I was getting stuff done at work and that was a nice feeling. Now if I could play with Leo more instead of relying on the TV and the Ipad (yes, on the same evening. What!) and get Jude to be in a better mood, I’d feel better as a mom. That’ll be next!

What do you do after an exhausting day? How do you relax? How do you cope?

2015 in Review - Top 5 Overall and a Look Ahead

Friday, January 1, 2016

2015 was a bit of a gut-kicker but there were very good times, too. Here are my top 5 from last year, in chronological order:

April: 10-year anniversary. I mean, achievement right there!

July: Family vacation in Seattle. We lived in Seattle for 7 years before moving back to Southern California and it was so good to reconnect with friends and show Leo all that he used to do. He didn't remember any of it!

September: Work trip to Armenia with Jude followed by a vacation with the family in France. Joe and Leo met us in Paris and we spent a few days in Normandy with my mom's side of the family and then a few days with my dad and his family. I saw my brother a ton, which is always a highlight.

November: My dad spent about 10 days with us and had his first Thanksgiving celebration -which he enjoyed. It was great to have him with us. Leo remembered him from September and Jude really liked him, too. We had nice dinner and great conversations.

December: A very successful Christmas, and for once one I didn't dread. I really got into the spirit this year thanks to Leo's excitement and anticipation. We shopped ahead of time. We had a great time!

So, now... 2016... I usually make big time resolutions, but this year I will let these 5 adjectives carry me:

Of course I also want to lose weight, meal plan, budget better, spend less time on my phone and tv. But really if the new year could provide rest / calm, if I could make good decisions and hold on to my beliefs and values, be generous in my givings, and if my family knew I loved them the most, 2016 would be a good year!

Cheers to 2016!

What were your highs in 2015? What do you hope for this new year?